On a tiring day after work my cell rings with a weird number on display .
Me: hello xxx speaking
He: Am I speaking to xxx ( my wicked mind - I thought that was my opening line)
Me: Yes it is, who am I speaking to?
He: Hi, my name is yyy and I was asked to contact you.
Me: Oh thanks for the call. How are you doing?
He: I am fine and hope you to are fine ( my wicked mind - I thought those were only written in letters during the 90‘s)
Me: Thanks, I am doing very well ( an awkward silence)
He: So which is your favourite sweet?
Me: I don’t have a sweet tooth however, I do have a fetish for ice-creams and donuts
He: Oh those are not sweets - sweets for eg. - coconut burfi
Me: That way I think cashew sweet popularly known as kaju katli
He: Nice! Mine is coconut barfi and my mom prepares it very well
Me: good to know ( my wicked mind - ask her to send a sample for me to certify please)
He: You know how to make those?
Me: Nopes, unfortunately neither does my mom ( my wicked mind - if you can learn it from your mom maybe I can develop a liking to it when you prepare it for me. I find it very romantic when men cook for their sweethearts)
He: Oh, that’s bad. How are you culinary skills otherwise
Me: I lived myself for 6 years and didn’t manage to loose weight eating the food prepared by me.
He: Oh ok! That’s nice to know.. What all do you cook
Me: A lot of things ( my wicked mind - I hope you are not interviewing me for the post of a chef in your new venture)
He: So who is your favourite God?
Me: Sai Baba of shirdi fame. (jokingly) I consider him my permanent boy friend someone whom I staunchly believe in
He: Oh not those human gods but God God’s you know for Eg. Ganesha or Hanuman
Me: Oh Both, my mom follows lord Ganesh and my dad is a staunch believer in Hanuman and I pray to both. ( my wicked mind - I have just followed the pattern of evolution in my worship and shifted to human God as you may call it lol!!).
He: Nice, I like both to. What is your favourite sports
Me: I like watching tennis and use to play Basket Ball in school and use to follow NBA
He: Oh you like NBA nice its form US you know, which is your favourite team?
Me: Nobody particular. Do you play sports?
He: same pinch ( my wicked mind - didn’t we leave those behind at school??)
Me: Nice, for your records these days I am into boxing too (chuckling childishly)
He: Oh, which category? ( my wicked mind - tell me how much to weigh depends on what it takes to knock you down!!).
Me: (laughing uncontrollably)
He: why you laughing
Me: ( still laughing uncontrollably)
He: What is so funny?
Me: I am watching tom n jerry, I find it very hilarious and its my stress buster
He: Oh, is that you favourite cartoon ( my wicked mind - yes until this call, now I think you are my hero a living cartoon).
Me: Anyway, thanks for your call. I a afraid it is late in my part of the world and I have an early start.
He: Oh, what time do you wake up
Me: At 5:30
He: You start so early to work?
Me: I hit the gym, come back get ready and leave
He: Oh you gym, nice habit
Me: Yes, its an addiction after a point. But my motive is also to loose weight
He: it doesn’t show in your photographs that you gym . But you look cute like a ball of butter,
Me: That’s the reason I need to reduce, if I were thin already why would I want to loose weight
He: Yes, hope you loose weight. I will give you a call next week and will mail you my number
Me: Thanks, sorry to cut your call it was wonderful speaking to you.
I think my job interviews were better than this. I wonder what was with my irrelevant favourites. After the 30+ minute conversation, I realised expect for his name, favourite sweet and God I didn’t get any other relevant information. I didn’t even know where he works or what the hell has he studied and which part of the globe he lives in. I am guessing the US because he was always happy to hear NBA.
My verdict - could have been provided I was into making cartoon movies. Sorry dude, that’s why maybe a course in communication skills might do a bit of help in all walks of your life. Nevertheless , I wish form the bottom of my heart you get someone who makes coconut burfi just the way you like it!
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